Republican party

The Republican Party used to be the liberal party of Abraham Lincoln, back when the Democratic Party was the conservative party. Over time the two parties switched political orientation, but conservatives still take great pride in claiming that theirs is the party of Lincoln. Lincoln, of course, would today disavow any connection to the immoral corrupt mess that is the modern Republican Party.

The Republican Party is distinguished by its platform of reducing taxes on the wealthy, subsidizing large corporations, catering to the pharmaceutical industry at the expense of the average citizen, drilling for oil and leveling old growth forest in all the nation's national parks and wildlife refuges, giving incredibly lucrative non-bid government and military contracts to corporations such as Halliburton (in which Vice President Cheney just coincidentally has enormous investments), depleting the Social Security Fund, denying affordable health care to millions of Americans, forcing every citizen to become an evangelical Christian, denying the possibility of abortion even if it is the only measure that will save a mother's life, keeping undocumented immigrants illegal to maintain cheap labor for business, blocking improved mileage and emmission standards in vehicles to keep GM and Ford happy, supporting the use of torture and abrogating every international treay the nation has ever signed.

The Republican Party has also developed great technical skill in dirty tricks used to steal elections and discredit critics. These tricks are even used against each other, as when George W. Bush's campaign spread rumors about John McCain and denigrated his military service to win the primary campaign in 2000. They have included the use of intimidation to prevent vote recounts in Florida during that same election, and a succcessful attempt to block phone lines in New Hampshire to counter a Democratic Party get out the vote initiative.