Soccer

The most Popular Sport?
Soccer is a sport practiced by most countries internationally, and is regarded as one of the best things in America except for football, hookers, alcohol, guns, and almost everything else. The game consists of two teams players kicking a ball. The ball is battered and eaten as a tasty confection in pancakes by many conservatives, or it's kicked into a large net, which is horrible, according to many above said persons, because it is, "Made in China, so it's @#$%%$". Soccer may also be referring to the popular sport of parents buying massive cars, (See SUV), to carry their two kids, who can ride a bike, to the park.

The Positive Sides of Soccer
1.It passes the time otherwise spent crying over the world.

2..Kicking things is awesome because Uncyclopedia says that Chuck Norris kicks things, and that his kick can "Kill everything before it has a chance to be diplomative"... I GET it! Chuck Norris is a Republican!

3...You actually get to use your head... You can't do that with anything else in the world, (Except for Liberapedia;)

4....It is a good metaphor to use when writing an insulting, (Towards Large Biggots, only...) article that no one cares about.

5.....Most liberals can get into rather good shape by practicing it daily, but, alas, conservatives have yet to do so, for their heads are of no use.