United Kingdom



United Kingdom of Great Britain and Northern Ireland (usually shortened to the United Kingdom, the U.K., or Britain) is a country and sovereign state in Western Europe to the north-west of mainland Europe. It comprises the island of Great Britain, the north-east part of the island of Ireland and many small islands. Northern Ireland is the only part of the UK with a land border, sharing it with the Republic of Ireland. The rest of the UK is surrounded by the waters of the Atlantic Ocean, the North Sea, the English Channel, and the Irish Sea. The UK is linked to France by the Channel Tunnel, it is a part of both NATO and the European Union.

Government
The United Kingdom is a Parliamentary democracy and also a constitutional monarchy comprising of four constituent countries: England, Northern Ireland, Scotland and Wales. The current monarch is Queen Elizabeth II, or "Betty Battenburg" as she's known among Republicans for her German heritage. She is the unelected hereditary Head of State but is by common consent Britain's "top chick". Queenie is also Head of State of fifteen other realms including Canada, Australia, New Zealand and Jamaica, known collectively as the British Commonwealth or The Nice Countries. The Crown Dependencies of the Channel Islands and the Isle of Man, formally possessions of the Crown, are not part of the UK but form a federacy with it. The UK has fourteen overseas territories, all remnants of the British Empire, which at its height encompassed almost a quarter of the world's land surface.

Past and present
Britain was the world's foremost power during the 19th and early 20th Century, but the economic cost of two world wars and the decline of its empire in the latter half of the 20th century diminished Britain's role and status in global affairs. The UK remains a major political, economic and nuclear military power; it holds a permanent seat on the United Nations Security Council, is a Great Power and is a member of the G8, NATO, the European Union and the Commonwealth of Nations.

There’s a bit of fun here
The only country in the world that knows how to make a nice cup of tea. Also, most of its occupants have no idea what an "English muffin" is. Presumably because it was ironically an American invention. Like French Fries. And diet pills.

Unlike America and other countries, the UK, actually fought the whole of WW1 and WW2. It ended up on the winning side in both cases, mostly thanks to America and other countries. The last time America fought a war against the UK, in 1812 1859, it lost tied, like the world cup amrite? However, Canada had one revolt which got pwn3d by the British, India never won its independance until the 40's, and Australia was just a prison colony. The last time America fought a war without the UK on its side, Vietnam, it lost, so it goes without saying that America needs the UK, at least until Afghanistan and Iraq are lost. Also, every time the UK fights on the side of America, half of its casualties are due to American soldiers killing them in friendly fire.

Serious again
It also has the benefit of not having conservatives who shoehorn their religious beliefs into politics. But Christians have been shoehorning their religious beliefs into education. And also it does have Conservatives who shoehorn their political beliefs into politics. That's still a problem. Margaret Thatcher annoyed a great many people when she was Prime Minister with her conservative policies. Unfortunately even more people liked her enough to vote for her once, twice and thrice. Fortunately that’s now past. In fact, Britain is quite a liberal country though Scandinavia is definitely a lot more liberal, so much so that it's more Social Democrat than liberal.

Britain has a LOT of rain though Norway has even more and thus the British understand what it is like to be constantly damp. Geddit? Neither do we.