George W. Bush's Religious Views

Many conservatives, rightist libertarians, and teabaggers claim that Barack Obama is a Muslim terrorist born in Kenya. Smart people know this is simply not true. So, what about Dubya's religious views? Well, let's take a look:

Views

 * God-The Christian God is the one True God. Muslims, Jews, Hindus, Buddhists, atheists, or anyone of another faith are unpatriotic.
 * Food-We all eat greasy food since it was a founding principle of America.
 * Other Dieties-Besides Jesus, all Americans must worship Reagan, Dubya himself (what an ego), and Ronald McDonald.
 * Global warming-Fake hocus pocus created by Al Gore to win 2000 election and Dubya stole it anyway. God would never allow the ice caps to melt, no matter how much fossil fuel we use.
 * People-White Christian males are superior to any other Americans because that's the way God intended. Man, Dubya's crazy.
 * Entertainment-Americans are stupid and need conservarive Christian morality to decide how they are entertained. Dubya prefers fasting, praying, and singing Psalms.
 * Morality-Only can Bible-fearing Christians can be moral. No one else can be moral. Dubya is above the Ten Commandments, though. He can steal...elections.
 * Patriotism-He believes in jingoistic ideals to stop evil Muslims, liberals, Satan.
 * Founders-They were extreme right-wing guys just like modern American conservatives and wanted a superior white Christian nation and were divinely inspired by God to do it and Dubya to do it and do their "will".
 * Relationships-Men are here to help one another. However, Dubya's philosophy of human relationships is that the rich white Christian males deserve high honors in America, like Bill Gates and Donald Trump. Poor people don't need help and can die. Relationships are forbidden with this by Jesus.
 * Taxes-The Bible says God wants the poor to be taxed and the rich to be tax-free in Dubya's mind.
 * Sexuality and Romance-God forbids it through the Apostle Paul. It demoralizes America and that's exactly why he married Laura. DUBYA IS A THEOCRAT!
 * Theocracy-One-world Christian government. He criticizes Obama's socialist ideals, since they don't involve Christianity. He says Christian theocrat nations prosper, like Israel (But Israel is actually a Jewish nation.
 * War-God inspires war against people of other faith and for oil. And that you can use fake WMDs to create war. Sounds like Christian Jihad.
 * Other stuff-Dubya belives it should be a capital offense to break the Sabbath, you should be stoned to death for adultery, and Jesus should be the sole God and role model, apart from himself.

In summary, Dubya is a theocrat and we should be thankful he's out of office.