Josef Stalin

Joseph Vissarionovich Jughashvili, more commonly known by his pseudoynm Josef Stalin was the leader of the Soviet Union from 1928 until his death in 1953 and is usually considered the bastard who fucked it all up. He was responsible for the deaths of at least 8 million people, because of his harsh collectivisation policies pursued throughout the 1930s. However, Conservatives place the death toll at one hundred billion jillion peasants.

Life and Death
Stalin was born on December 18th, 1878, to a Georgian mother and father. He grew up as a tough ragamuffin in a lawless Georgian town which frequently held organised street brawls.

Stalin died on 5th March, 1953, after suffering a stroke on 1st March.

The extent to which Stalin had created a terror state can be seen in him not being discovered until 10pm on 1st March, as his guards were under order not to disturb him. He hadn't emerged from his room since he went into it the previous night and his guards were too scared to enter his chamber without permission, they had to receive authorisation from the Politburo instead.

In the Communist Party
He rose through the Communist Party of the Soviet Union to become General Secretary in 1922. Over the course of the 1920s as he continued his rise, he made his title synonymous with supreme leader.

As the 1920s progressed and the 1930s rolled around, Stalin began to commence purges of his Party, the Army and the People of Russia. As the 1930s continued and the purges became more violent and the scale of them grew, Stalin began to show more and more symptoms of paranoia, as he purged his entire Party, including all his old comrades from the revolutionary days.

Stalinism, Communism, Socialism
When Right wing ignorami (see Sarah Palin) claim moderate left wing politicians or policies are "socialist" or "communist" they mean "Stalinist" but are too stupid to know there's a massive difference between the three.

A communist or a fascist?
Although he was a member of the Communist Party of the Soviet Union, he has a lot in common with modern day republicans. That includes: the tendency to invade other countries and an urge to imprison people who disagree with him.

Moustache
Stalin had a big moustache, very similar to Tom Selleck's, although Tom Selleck is not a dictator with the blood of infinity billion kulaks on his hands.