Dick Cheney

Dick Cheney is the vice president of the United States and also the United States' fourth branch of government. In mid-2007, the Office of the Vice President asserted that Cheney is not an "entity within the executive branch." House Democratic Leader Rahm Emanuel quickly agreed to Cheney's assertion and decided to cut off all his executive funding.

On June 18, 2007, Emanuel also asserted that Cheney, as the fourth branch, should move out of the White House. "He should return the salary the American taxpayers have been paying him since January 2001, and move out of the home for which they are footing the bill."

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Cheney's hobbies include golfing, fishing, and shooting his friends in the face. He got another friend committed of perjury. The holder of $18 million in Halliburton stock, he has helped funnel $11 billion worth of government contracts to Halliburton. Cheney insists, however, that he has no financial stake in Haliburton. 

He is fat, bald, and possibly a child-molesting homosexual. It is believed he wipes his rather large anus on the American flag and secretly hunts bald eagles "of course they are caged when he hunts them and their wings are broken because its obvious the VP lacks marksmanship". His view on the world is hate and fear stemming from a homo-erotic childhood filled with racism and an obvious clinical case of penis envy.

He really likes hunting